Katy Perry may have kissed a girl and liked it, but that was nothing compared to the kinky sexual acting out that resulted in her suspension from school back in the day. It seems the "Teenage Dream" girl got up close and personal--and also super kinky--with a tree. That's not a misprint. As a teen, La Perry was temporarily kicked out of school for "humping a tree."
Before the Parents Television Council or whatever the organized prudes are calling themselves these days get their collective panties in a twist, Katy's kinky behavior was all for the sake of art. She was acting out a scene in a school play, and she used the tree as a prop. It sounds complicated, but it's really not.
"When I was in sixth grade I was suspended from school for humping a tree!" the former Mrs. Russell Brand recalls. "We were doing a play on Greek mythology and I was Aphrodite. My love interest was absent, and so I used the tree as my partner."
Well, that sounds logical. Sort of. Trees are tall and strong and sturdy, and, unlike a human partner, they can't get nerves or stage fright and start trembling and shaking. But if it was the impromptu arboreal love scene was part of a play produced and sanctioned by the school, why did the teachers give Katy Perry the boot?
"It was a Christian school!" the Part of Me star explained.
Oh well, looks like there's nothing more to say. Except perhaps: Was it a boy or girl tree?
Â© Hope Carson 2012