Robert Pattinson can always be counted on for off the wall remarks, weird jokes, and odd (to say the least) revelations. His latest is that back in the day, to escape the unwanted attentions of his Twihards, he took to checking into hotels under various phony names. That's not so unusual. Lots of paranoid superstars do the same thing. The bizarre thing about Rob's version of traveling incognito is that the alias he chose was the name of a sex act.
For someone who hates nicknames in general, including his own moniker, RPattz, Pattinson certainly chose a doozy for himself in order to avoid his fans. In an effort to ditch the crowds of hysterical females inevitably waiting outside his hotel rooms wherever he goes in the world, Rob tries to disguise himselfÂ—both physically and on paper. For the physical transformation, he dons disguises that are, alas, cumbersome and ineffective. In fact, they usually have the opposite effect.
"...instead I'm just getting more and more conspicuous," RPattz whines, "I'm wearing two hoods, a hat and sunglasses, which kind of stands out in the middle of the night. So I'm learning to sprint."
Wow. Must be rough. Keeping his presence in hotels a secret is much easier. He simply uses phony names. His favorite? Well...it's also the name of a sexual act that can take the solitary form of masturbation or it can be performed by a partner.
"I was Clive Handjob in Paris," the Twilight heart-throb revealed. "Everyone in the hotel called me 'Monsieur Handjob'. That was good, cheap fun."
Good cheap fun indeed. Wonder what Kristen Stewart would say about that one? Of course, knowing KStew's proclivity for profanity including F-bombs, she might wholeheartedly approve.
What do you think of Robert Pattinson's hotel alias? Funny or not?
Photo Source: Zimbio
Â© Hope Carson 2012